Consider the Flea

“. . . The flea when jumping accelerates 50 times faster than a space shuttle. Although fleas cannot fly, they can jump over seven inches high and thirteen inches long, that is about one hundred and fifty times its own length. Without its outer shell it would get smashed by the velocity of the jump, and especially on its landing….” Insecta Inspecta World (hwww.insecta-inspecta.com/fleas/cat/jumping.html)

When you rolled out of bed this morning I’m sure you asked: How high can a flee jump?  No? Me either.  But, I found myself face-to-face with the answer to this fascinating question. Being somewhat creative, I wondered how I could use this useful and valuable information. So I did a little research.

I discovered that when fleas are put into a container (as in a small jar or drinking glass), the little rascals will literally jump out.  If you place a sheet of paper over the top of the container, the fleas will jump up and hit the sheet of paper then fall back to the bottom.

Here’s what’s really interesting: After several failed attempts to jump out of the container, the fleas are “mentally reconditioned” and will only leap as high the sheet of paper – even after the paper has been removed.  Their previous reality has been replaced with a new one that limits their performance.

That’s a worthy lesson for us to mull over.  I believe many of us, based on personal experiences, are held in place (in our business endeavors, spiritual growth, personal development, personal relationships, etc.) by our own self imposed limits.

In some behavior, we are like fleas. For example, we were jumping high, but we got hit hard by the economy (out of our control) and experienced difficult times. Understand that there is no physical barrier.  But lots of folk carry on as though there is a ceiling that prevents them from breaking out and experiencing any kind of new reality.

Like the flea, some high level performers learned that jumping high meant getting the snot kicked out of them, so they made mental adjustments to lessen the pain. The heartbreaking side effect of that choice is that they have also limited the hope for future high level performance.

The current (2010) economic climate…, well…, sucks. Most of the people I know have lost huge sums of money and equity. I know I have lost millions. A lot of people I know have filed for bankruptcy protection. I even know people who have committed suicide over (I presume) the loss of money, credibility, a spouse and family.

My heart truly goes out to those who feel despair. I’m empathetic – I truly feel their pain. But now, faced with the economic challenges before them, many of my friends and acquaintances have limited their options by constructing the mental barriers I previously referred to.

They are like the fleas that will not jump out of the uncovered container.  The result is, not knowing what else to do, they ask fellow fleas, “How do we break free? How can we move forward? How do we get out of this mess? How can we succeed?”

Here’s a valuable principal founded on truth:

If you want to go to escape your current limitations and feel the exhilaration found in the next level (in whatever discipline or interest you choose), don’t ask your fellow fleas what to do. If they held the answers for breaking free from the limits they now embrace, they wouldn’t be in your position.  In a worst case scenario, they will keep you from moving toward success by unconsciously doing their best to hold you where they are. Remember – misery loves company.

If you truly want to disentangle yourself from the tentacles of a limited belief system, and if you want to experience freedom from your self imposed limits, seek out those whom are not limited by your mental obstacles. Find someone, a mentor, who is where you want to be. That person can help you much more than fellow fleas sharing the same limited mindset.

Word of Caution: Thinking outside the box, and acting outside the box, may cost you some friends. Most of your fellow fleas will want you to stay within the boundaries of their comfort zone. They will say, in a variety of ways, words that project the idea:  “You can’t do that!”

When you are free of those self imposed boundaries, your “friends” may well reject you because you will not share the same mental altitude anymore. But that’s okay. Move forward.

Here’s what I suggest:

1.      Clearly define where you want to be

2.      Answer This: Who can help you get there?” and “What am I willing to give in return?

3.      Set some target dates for successes

4.      Define how you will get there

5.      Work your plan and make adjustments as needed

6.      Associates with those not limited with your mindset

7.      Take one other flea with you on your journey

It’s now up to you. What will you do? Whatever your choice, you have chosen a path.  Robert Frost concludes his famous “The Road Not Taken” by writing:

“I shall be telling this with a sigh

“Somewhere ages and ages hence:

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –

“I took the one less travelled by,

“and that has made all the difference.”

I challenge to you is to take the “road less traveled” and shred the paper barrier.

Winning With Physical Limitations!

If you want to succeed in every area in your life, you must get in the game. You have to take an active role in your own future: don’t allow others to dictate your success. Sometimes this means working past, through or around a disadvantage, such as a physical limitation.

To use a sports analogy, you have to step up to the plate, lift your bat over your shoulder, and take a swing. Mickey Mantle, center fielder and first baseman for the Yankees in the fifties and sixties, was the home run king for a number of years. Whenever “the Mick” strolled to home plate to take his turn at bat, people paid attention, knowing they might see him hit a ball out of the park for a home run. What most people don’t realize, however, is that Mickey Mantle held the record for the most strike-outs: he failed at bat more than any other professional baseball player. Yet what we remember are his successes.

The same thing can happen to you: keep getting into the “batter’s box” and swinging… hit a home run or even a base hit now and again, and people won’t remember your failures. They will remember the times you scored.

You have to be in the game. If you are living a life as a spectator, you aren’t getting in the batter’s box. You’re not even sitting in the dugout. People who use excuses for sitting out limit themselves by their attitudes. I know of a real estate broker in a wheelchair who earns six figures each and every year. He figured out a way to sell real estate without picking people up in his car and showing them property: he does it all by mail, email and fax from the comfort of his office. He targets out-of-state owners and lists their property for sale.

There is a general contractor in California who is in much the same position. He pulls up to a job in his truck and never gets out of it. He can’t. He can’t walk.

A man in our church owned and operated a successful restaurant. He had once owned a profitable tire re-capping business. One day, while working at his plant, a tire blew up in his face and blinded him. Steel plates were put in his face. He wasn’t able to return to the work he knew, so, in his forties, he opened a restaurant. I’ve seen him stand at the cashier’s box and make change for his customers.

I became a general contractor when it became apparent that I could no longer work construction. One day, nailing shakes on a roof outside of Santa Rosa, California, I bent down to plug in my skill saw so I could cut a hip roof. As soon as I connected the cord to the saw, I was thrown off the roof. There was short in the wiring. I broke three vertebrae in the fall. I was flat on my back for a time and when I recovered, I found I had neither the strength nor the stamina to do the work I had previously done. For years, I lived with chronic pain.

I’d been pulled off of the playing field. But I didn’t stop playing: I learned how to play a different position in the same of game. In the process I stopped working for hourly pay (which is a sure fire plan for just getting by) and began making very serious money and receiving positive recognition from others.

Rather than presenting a stop sign, a handicap or disability can be your ticket to great things. If life gives you lemons, rejoice in the lemons and find a way to sell lemonade. I’ve read many stories of penniless immigrants coming to this country and becoming millionaires. If someone can go from rags to riches speaking broken English, you can do it with a handicap or disability.

Enough about other people – here’s how you can succeed:

1. Think about all the things you can do and make a list of them. Decide what you want to do, and find a niche.

2. Set some measurable goals, both long- and short-term.

3. Define how you will attain those goals, and write a plan. You must have a road map directing you to your destination.

4. Your plan must include an activity for each day. Do the daily activity. Focus on it, rather than the goal.

5. Make adjustments as needed.

6. Be a mentor to others. There are millions of people who would like to be where you are. Take one or two along for the ride with you, and teach them what you have learned.

7. Learn to give. In order to have a complete, balanced and fulfilled life, you have to learn to give some of your time and some of your money to something greater than yourself and your bank account. He with the largest list of assets at death is not the winner. If you can’t learn to give, you are controlled by your possessions – a very sad and lonely way to live.

Remember, if you don’t make it happen, it won’t happen. Get in the game!

There’s Power in Taking Action

“As you begin to take action toward the fulfillment of your goals and dreams, you must realize that not every action will be perfect. Not every action will produce the desired result. Not every action will work. Making mistakes, getting it almost right, and experimenting to see what happens are all part of the process of eventually getting it right.” Jack Canfield

To achieve a level of success, and hopefully significance, you need to create a precise plan detailing exactly what you must do in order to realize your dream. You will have to adjust your plan as you go forward, but if you don’t write is down, how will you know if you are making progress toward the goal? Be sure, too, to set a timetable for the completion of your tasks. Open-ended tasks seem always to be pushed to the rear of the priorities.

Breakdown your objectives into daily activities and then manage those activities. You’ll be surprised at how easy it is to complete a lot of work when you manage your time well. Don’t let the phone, walk-in customers or whatever “emergencies” may present themselves rule your life. Also, as best as you can, resist the urge to put off doing the things that need to get done.  Take Charge!

During certain hours, I refuse to take phone calls. I let them go to voice mail and return them when I arrive at the allotted time. I used to have a script on my voice mail that said, “Thanks for calling. I have several appointments today. I can return your call between 10 and 11 AM or 3 to 4 PM. Please let me know when the best time for you would be.” That simple script gave me back my life.
When you write down your list of daily tasks, post the list where you can easily see it. You will find the more you look at it, the more likely you will be to accomplish the tasks you’ve set. And importantly, I find that it helps to deal with difficult things first. Get anything distasteful or disagreeable off your plate as soon as you can so you can enjoy the rest of the day.

Thomas Carlyle, the 9^th Century Scottish essayist, wrote: “Men do less than they ought, unless they do all they can.” If you fail to take action, you will fail in reaching your target. Do all you can!

Define what you want to accomplish (as best as you can at this point) and do the daily activity that’s needed to get you where you want to go. Practice focusing on the daily activity – not necessarily the end goal. The action you implement will get you to the finish line. There is power in taking action.

As Les Brown said, “You don’t have to be great to get started, but you have to get started to be great.”

Now, just do it.  Start right now.

Take Personal Responsibilty

“Did you ever stop to think that everything you are or ever will be is completely up to you? Just imagine! You are where you are because of who you are. Everything that exists in your life exists because of you, because of your behavior, words and actions.

“Because you have freedom of choice and because you have chosen each and every circumstance of your life, you are completely responsible for all of your success and failure, your happiness and unhappiness, your present and future.” Brian Tracy

There’s no magic pill that will make you happy or successful. The simple fact is you have to face your fears and go in the direction of your choice. If your goal is to succeed in your family life, business dealings, spiritual growth or social circles, you must take the bull by the horns and address those areas – and it begins by taking personal responsibilities for your choices and actions.

Our culture no longer believes in tasking personal responsibility. People are eager to place blame elsewhere. For example, if you made a bad decision in a real estate investment, it had to be the fault of the sales person, developer, or someone else close to the transaction. If you lost money in the stock market, it has to be the broker’s fault or the bad advice from Uncle Harry.

If your personal life is in shambles, of course the cause is the spouse you married or your family of origin. The causes of your failures seem to belong to everyone but whom really is at fault.  That would be you.

Here’s how you unlock to door to enjoying the freedom of success in all areas of your life. Before you develop positive, self-affirming, self-talk scripts to enhance your personal development and growth:

1.      Acknowledge that you are solely responsible for the choices.

2.      Accept that you are responsible for what you choose to feel or think.

3.      Accept that you choose the direction for your life.

4.      Accept that you cannot blame others for the choices you have made.

5.      Tear down the facade of defense or rationale for why others are responsible for who you are or what has happened to you.

6.       Embrace the belief that you are responsible for determining who you are.

7.      Point the finger of responsibility back to yourself when you discuss the consequences of your actions.

8.      Take an honest inventory of your strengths, abilities, talents, virtues and positive points.

9.      Let go of blame and anger toward those in your past who did the best they could, given the limitations of their knowledge, background and awareness.

10.  Let go of your anger, hostility, pessimism and depression over past hurts, pains, abuse, mistreatment and misdirection.

I know from personal experience that it’s easy to name all the things that rendered you incapable of reaching your goals, but it’s a good deal more gratifying to tell others how the same things didn’t stop you and to describe the brilliance with which you met each challenge (not the mention how you were inspired to succeed).

Successful people don’t place blame or make excuses – because they don’t have to. There is almost nothing you can’t plow through or work around.

From this day forward, choose to take responsibility for your own actions and choices. Find the power in taking personal responsibility and you will be free to live a much fuller and happier life. It’s amazing how liberating it is to rid yourself of the negative energy associated with the blame game.

Now, go make it a great day.

Swing Away

“In playing ball, and in life, a person occasionally gets the opportunity to do something great. When that time comes, only two things matter: being prepared to seize the moment and having the courage to take your best swing.” Hank Aaron, Baseball Player

One of the greatest hitters in baseball history is Mickey Mantle who is remembered as a great home run slugger, but did you know he struck out more than 1,750 times?  In addition, he walked to first base more than 1,750 times.  In other words, there were more than 3,500 times he went to home plate and didn’t hit the ball.  That is the equivalent of seven full seasons he never had a base hit!

Here’s the lesson:  it’s not the misses that count, it’s the hits.  Learn from your misses but focus on your hits.

When I make a mistake I increase my awareness and improve my performance. I refuse to relegate my disappointments and failures to the back of the bus and purposefully move them up front where I can deal with them, work out the kinks, make adjustments and get back on track toward success.  I turn my mistakes and failures into stepping stones toward my goal.  I figure if didn’t make a mistake yesterday, I didn’t’ learn much.

If you want to enjoy success in your personal life and business, and overcome the invisible handicaps that are detrimental to that success, step in the batter’s box and strike out a few times.  It’s okay – never fear failure!

Here’s how you step up to the plate:

1. Decide what it is you want to do and carve out a niche for yourself.  If you try to be all things to all people the deck is stacked against you.  You have to find a unique position for you

2. Set some measurable goals. You need both long term and short term measurable goals. Write these goals out on paper.  Until you write them down, they simply do not exist.

3. Define how you will attain those goals. Write a step-by-step plan that clearly defines how you are going to reach your destination.

4. Work your plan. As you do the daily activity it takes to accomplish your goals, focus on that activity rather than the goal.  If your goal is to purchase one rehab property each month, focus on the activity that will result in that one purchase.

5. Make adjustments as needed. When a mistake is made determine where you went wrong and readjust your approach but do not allow yourself to become distracted from achieving your goals.

6. As you work your plan, start thinking about ways to give to others.  If you cannot give away your money, it owns you.  You will become self-focused and shallow and contentment will always elude you.

7.  Be a mentor to others. There are millions of people who would like to be where you are.  Take one or two along for the ride with you.

The question you now face is crucial.  What are you going to do with this information?  My advice is to swing away.  Strike out, make some adjustments – most of all enjoy the ride.  Life can and should be a thrilling experience, but it’s up to you to make it happen.

Batter up!

The Challenge of Change

It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad. C.S. Lewis

Change (sometimes called challenges, disappointments, failures, and the like), in our lives is something most of us tend to avoid.  Change is hard whether in personal relationships, business, politics, finances – whatever. It’s like the bird trying to come out of the egg.

In reality, the only constant is change. We are in a state of flux until we die. Although facing change head-on is like swimming against a river’s current the benefit is that the process, while painful at times, sharpens our senses and makes us stronger as we struggle to adjust.  Yes, it would be much easier to simply go with the flow but any dead fish can do that and who wants to be a dead fish?

The struggle that comes from the emotional, psychological and physical effects of change is necessary to go forward and grow stronger. If you don’t move forward, you will move backward – there is no staying the same. It is the struggle that enables you to achieve the next level.

Don’t be a dead fish that floats with the current (death) or an bird that won’t break free of it’s shell and only wished it could fly (slavery). The goal is to look at change with expectancy (positive mental attitude) and embrace the opportunities that will come to you as a result of enduring the pain of breaking free from the challenge of change.

Living is a grand experience.  Embracing change will make it possible for you to learn life lessons and live life to the fullest.

Now, its up to you. Go create an amazing day.

What Others Think About You

“Why do people accept the opinions of others about themselves as truth? Who is going to live the rest of your life anyway? Doug Firebaugh

What is the value of someone’s opinion of your ability and personal worth? When we were teenagers, most of us wanted the acceptance of our peers. As a result, it mattered a great deal and we wanted to conform (non-conformists conform to the mores of other non-conformists!).

By the time we were in our late 30s and 40s we said we didn’t much care what “they” thought. But by then our lives were molded as we tried to live up to the (sometimes) impossible standards.

Now I find that what was really important at age 20 does not register on any scale of importance I now embrace. The time I spent thinking about what other people thought about me was, for me, truly a waste of time. On top of that, I’ve learned they really didn’t spend too much time thinking about me anyway.

Today when someone has an unsolicited opinion of me that I find objectionable, I simply think, “That person is rather presumptuous, isn’t he/she?”

The life you are living is yours. So find purpose and live it to the fullest. What others think about you will not pay your bills or produce wonderful relationships – nor does what they think really matter!

Just remember the value of someone’s unsolicited opinion of you is worth every penny you paid for it!

If you’re interested, here’s my advice:

1.      Find objective truth (as opposed to subjective truth) in which to adhere and serve as an anchor for your life and life’s work.

2.      Be yourself! Along your journey in self development, set goals that accomplish things you believe important.

3.      As stated in body of this article, find purpose in your life and live it. You are here for a reason. Why are you here?

4.      Regardless of the nay-sayers, embrace and apply principles that build your personal character and help define the person you want to be.

5.      Make time for meditation and reflection. In our fast pace society, this time is needed so we can reconnect with our values and moral compass.

6.      Truly realize that success is not accomplished in a vacuum. We need other people in our lives. With that recognition, we can learn to give of ourselves to others who are less fortunate that we are.

7.      When you fail to live up to your ideal standards, and you will on occasion, recognize the failure, make adjustments, and then simply move forward. Here’s how one first century thinker dealt with the issue of moving forward in his personal life: “But this one thing I do–forgetting everything which is past and stretching forward to what lies in front of me, with my eyes fixed on the goal I push on to secure the prize . . .”

Now, go make it a great day by focusing on the “prize” – forward looking – regardless of what “others” have to say about it.

Power In Embracing Enthusiasm

“You can do anything if you have enthusiasm. Enthusiasm is the yeast that makes your hopes rise to the stars. With it, there is accomplishment. Without it there are only alibis.” Henry Ford 

Enthusiasm is rarely a topic that comes to mind when we think of success. And yet, without it life becomes mundane and the spark we wish to ignite in others fizzles away without the desired result.

Embracing enthusiasm is important because it replaces fear and worry. When I was in my early 40s I experienced what many call a mid-life crisis. Prior to this dark, short chapter in my life, I was accustomed to making many and huge decisions. I spiraled downward into a period of depression in which I could not decide on the color of my socks each morning.

The catalyst for my turn-around was the new project I tepidly decided to take on. Early in the process, enthusiasm was a quality I forced on myself.  I pretended I had it until it finally showed up. It showed up because (I think), as others became excited about my dream, their excitement spilled over to me and replaced pretending enthusiasm with the real thing.

I grew into a bona fide, honest cheerleader for finding success in very “today.” That was the end of “bad days” for me. Now there are good days and, better yet, great days!  And an interesting thing happened: my enthusiasm and excitement became contagious. Others reflected my newly refashioned positive mindset. The spark I sought to ignite became a forest fire from which many lives were positively impacted.

Here’s my advice to you if you want to enjoy success and are having a tough time getting excited:

1.  Fake enthusiasm until it becomes real (no, you will not be a phony)

2. Surround yourself with positive people (don’t listen to negative talk)

3. Think about how you can help others less fortunate than you (gets the focus off you and on someone else – which is a great thing for your well being)

4. Learn how to give yourself and some of your money to others (if you refuse to give, then the things you own and the money you possess OWNS you)

Norman Vincent Peale states, “Often enthusiasm is the bridge between poverty and prosperity.” I know, from personal experience, he’s right. He also wrote: “Enthusiasm releases the drive to carry you over obstacles and adds significance to all you do.”

Now it’s up to you. What will you do with this information? File it away in some dark corner, or get excited about your dreams and go for them? It’s your choice.

Now, go make it an enthusiastically great day

Money is Just an Idea

“Money is just an idea.” I like that quote and it’s something I believe! Recently a friend challenged my thinking when I used it: “That may be the dumbest thing you have ever said. ‘Money is just an idea’ is simply baloney,” he said. “There is no way having an idea will pay the rent or put gas in the car.”

I read a book that caught my attention several years ago. At the time, it was relatively new in the market place and the first of several books in a series. The little known author was Robert Kiyosaki and the book was “Rich Dad, Poor Dad.” It was he who used that statement and caught my attention.

Can money and wealth be just one idea away? Yes, it can and I will share with you principles  from which you can find that to be true. First, however, I want you to understand what it does not mean: You will not find $100,000 in cash on your nightstand when you wake up one morning with a great idea or two. Nope – won’t happen!

Here are four foundational principles you need to build upon if you want to experience, in the shortest amount of time, that “money is just an idea”:

1.    Good personal relationships – I’ve never seen anyone bring up the subject of good relationships in this context. But good personal relationships with your spouse and/or close friends are needed.

We are beings that need others. Without this ingredient you will always be looking for something more because you instinctively know something is missing. Besides, people in your sphere of relationships may help fund and/or market your idea.

2.    Good social skills – We do not succeed in a vacuum. Social skills will help you make contacts that can help transform your idea into a reality.

“Networking” is a trendy word now, but it’s also a needed ability. One theory suggests that you are only six people removed from someone who has what you need. Do you need money, information, ideas, support, or any other thing? Good social networking skills will open doors that will provide answers you require.­­

The good news is, networking can be learned. One way you can accomplish this is to form a master mind group with whom you meet on a regular basis.  This group of can offer support and information on your quest for success. Such a group has been a great experience for me and have permitted me to make business moves in a more timely fashion because they had experiences that aided my development.

There are books available on the subject of net working that can help you become more of a social networking person, too. Pick up two or three and get some good ideas on how to build social contacts and turn those social contacts into assets. Then, put into action what you learn.

One book you may want to consider is “Networking Magic” by Rick Frishman. Ivan Misner wrote “The World’s Best Know Marketing Secret, 2nd Edition: Building Your Business with Word-of-Mouth.”  Make the time to to your local library or order a book(s) on Amazon.com as soon as you can. You’ll not be sorry.

3.    Spiritual Balance - This area of our lives is often overlooked or avoided in much of the information written on the subject of success.

Here’s rock-solid truth: When we are out of balance spiritually, we start believing that we are the center of the universe and everything revolves around us. That kind of thinking leads to an empty, shallow existence.  Or, we start believing we are unworthy of anything thing good. The latter will result in lack of effort and a lack of motivation to move forward.

We are spiritual beings and benefit from time scheduled for spiritual “exercise” – just like we do from physical exercise. How will you build “spiritual biceps,” and develop a more balanced life, without focused effort for spiritual equilibrium?  You may contact me if you want to learn more about this.

4.    Financial basics – Turning your ideas into money will take some basic understanding of accounting and how money works. When I started my first brick and mortar business at the age of 20, I didn’t know if I had $5 or $500.

My advice to anyone wanting financial success is to take a local community college course (or self directed study) on basic accounting principles. There are also accounting software packages available that will assist you keeping good books, too.

After a solid foundation is constructed, you can build on it by gaining specific information, building a solid business model, and developing marketing know-how – all of which are subjects for other written pieces.

Money is just an idea away. But, you have to get in gear and go to work by defining in writing what you want to accomplish. Then, describe what you have to do to get there. After that, break down your goals into daily activity and DO the activity each day.

Kiyosaki also wrote: “The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way.” As you move forward, you will need to make adjustments as new problems and disappointments pop up – and they surely will.

Ultimately, if you work smart, you can realize your dreams by turning your ideas into money.

Now go make your dreams come true.

© 2010 by Don Loyd    All Rights Reserved.